ANTM: Wearing China's fashion export too literally

ANTM: Wearing China's fashion export too literally

This week, one of the greatest logical defeats was ever purported on 18 seasons of ANTM. That’s saying something for a show helmed by a woman who doled out modeling superpowers this season, but still, it happened. Want to know what this feat of mental dissonance was? An American model called her other model “too vain.” The rest of the Brit models chimed in to agree that, yes, this model liked looking at herself too much in the mirror.

Am I missing something? These are models. Of course they like staring at themselves in the mirror and/or thinking that they are the most beautiful creatures on God’s earth.

But I digress. I watch ANTM for the stupidity, after all. In other news, the final six contestants traveled to Macau this week, which is a special administrative district in China, similar to Hong Kong. Nobody seems to know much about Macau, if there is anything to know, but the girls shrieked with excitement when noted fashion photographer, Nigel Barker, informed them of their trip, and pretended to know that Macau was a city in Asia.

Once in China, ANTM proceeded to attempt to cram every Chinese stereotype into its short hour time slot.

First, they met with a Chinese aura reader, who told each of the models that she loved her mother and had a strong personality. Then, he told them what colors they should wear based on their auras. The girls were then assigned to dress themselves and put on makeup that best represented their personalities. They all returned looking terrible, but Laura still won a day at the spa.

For their photo shoot, the models had to pose in colorful silk dresses made by Hong Kong designer Barney Cheng in front of a Chinese screen wearing black-and-short-with-bangs wigs. Great, Shanghai in the 1920’s, but with black and white girls! To make matters worse, they had to pose with silkworms creepy-crawling all up and down their arms. It was a pretty terrible shoot, and none of the girls walked away with particularly great pictures, except for Laura, who took away best photo of the week.

Tyra punishes Catherine and Alicia with worst photos of the week. Alicia, who won best photo the week before, apparently made the dress look even worse than it did on a hanger. Yikes. Catherine is in the bottom two because she looks really terrible in her photos each week, but also has a strange looking nose. In the end, Queen Catherine is sent packing because she isn’t vain enough to win.