America's Next Top Model: models in charge

America's Next Top Model: models in charge

I can’t believe that America’s Next Top Model takes itself seriously anymore, but perhaps Tyra Banks has a lower self-awareness than most people. She wrote a book called Modelland about models with superpowers and went to Harvard business school, but still has the humility to wear a plastic superhero cape. What a classy lady!


This week, Tyra visits the house to assign the models their superpowers, based on her bestselling (seriously) book. She assigns Laura the title “Zaglicious” because her propensity for living outside of the box, and Catherine something like “Era-licious” because she can pose like she’s from a bunch of different centuries. She gives the other girls other inane titles—by pasting them onto their shirts—and they’re supposed to model with these superpowers in mind. As if models weren’t already confused enough.


Next comes a pretty interesting challenge with new and terrifying super-bitch judge, Kelly Cutrone. The contestants have to design their own fashion shoot, and delegating tasks like planning the hair and makeup, casting male models, buying props for the shoot, and designing the thematic elements. Azmarie is chosen as the leader of the American team, while Annaliese is picked to head of the British group.


The American team sets up a London-punk shoot with tough makeup and hair. Azmarie proves to be an effective leader, and Kelly Cutrone tells her that she makes everyone feel comfortable. The British team chooses to replicate a simple, 1960’s-themed mod shoot, but Annaliese and the rest of the girls are scattered during the challenge, much to Cutrone’s chagrin.


During the shoot, Louise and Kelly have an altercation, with Kelly telling Louise that she shouldn’t be running around the studio. Louise is really pissed off, but gets a stunning photograph in channeling her angry energy. But she’s still mad when she goes into the critique, and the judges tell her that she has one of the worst attitudes they’ve ever seen. She can’t take it, and she storms off of the set, telling some random producer in the back lot that she needs to go home. It’s pretty crazy—the judges seemed beyond shock that a model could be so insubordinate. The hazards of working with pretty girls.


In the end, Azmarie takes home best picture for her matador-esque androgynous photo. Tyra chooses four girls as the bottom four. Really, though, they’ve just psyched us out because Louise isn’t coming back, and we knew it. Tyra says she only has one photo in her hands, and the girls look nervous until they see that it’s a photo that has compiled all of their shots into one. Phew.